To Work, or Not To Work, That is the Question

It's a work ethic dilemma. There isn't anything important that I must do at work, in fact there isn't really much of anything to do. And I don't really want to do anything either, I'm just counting the days until I quit. But it doesn't feel right sitting her doing nothing, so I try to think of things to do, that isn't to boring, and at the same time isn't to hard. I must try to find the right balance.

And what could be more meaningful than writing this?

Prosperous Prospects

It's silly I know, but the fact that there are actually people out there reading what I write, makes me feel obligated to write something regularly, and I don't write as often as I would like. But with the life I'm living, there is just not enough time.

It's late, and I'm tired, but it's been one hell of a week, I can tell you. For one thing she told me she loves me. And I said that I loved her to. So there, that's that, no? Alas, no, of course not, nothing is ever as simple as all that. I settle for what there is for the moment though.

Every day, when there is some kind of trouble at work, and there usually is, every day, I say to myself, well, just a few weeks more, and then I'll be leaving. And it feels so good! And apparently I will be able to get some funding for studying next year, which was a pleasant surprise. I like the shape of things to come right now. And on Friday, one week from today, I'm flying to Paris. I try to go there once a year, Paris is after all my favourite city, and this year I will for the first time visit it in late autumn, or perhaps early winter. I'm sure it will be just as lovely as always.

Late Autumn Sun

I should be outside, taking a lovely walk in the lovely autumn weather. But the sun will not set yet for some time. Eventually I'll get there.

Yesterday I saw an Australian film, Jindabyne, about life in a little town among what might be called white trash. Family tensions, racism, male chauvinism, and environmental concerns where among the topics referred to. And yet it made my constant longing for that marvelous country increase, ever so slightly. When will I return?

In China, the experiment with grass root democracy that has been going on for some years, with elections on low levels in towns and communities, seems to have come to a standstill. That is a shame. Surely the best way to ease the tensions that simmers, and occasionally explodes, all over the country, is to give to people more power over their lives, and over the decision process. Since I take it for granted that the leading men and women of the Chinese Communist Party read my blog on a daily basis, I hereby take the opportunity to urge them to expand democracy in urban and rural China.

Neighbours and Novels

One month from today I'm moving, and I'm very happy about that. But one good thing about my present location is that it always makes for good dinner conversation. Here's a priest who gives wild parties every other week, elevators that work at random, plumbing that works even more seldom, weird transvestites who occasionally comes barging in, demanding that I stop walking around without socks in my apartment, and that I stop vacuum cleaning in the middle of the night (my angry denial of such vile deeds was met with the comment "yeah, whatever"). To get to the nearest bus station, please to walk through the underground parking lot of a hospital. So part of me will miss this crazy building, affectionately known (at least in the good old days) as Chlamydia Tower.

I'm still reading The Namesake, by Jhumpa Lahiri. I love it, it's so real and nuanced. I feel every breath of the characters, I can see them, smell them, I know them better than I know myself. When I read it I feel like I'm there, with them. I am Nikhil (or Gogol, as he was called when young).

I like to read a book which engage you so much that afterwards you have memories of things, that you only after a little while realises are not your memories, but things that happened in the book that you read. The first part of Fasting, Feasting, by Anita Desai, takes place in India, in a big house, and I feel like I have been there. I have been sitting on that porch on agonisingly hot days, watching the air shiver in the sun.

Jhumpa Lahiri has won the Pulitzer Prize, I wonder when I will.

The House, The Senate, The Swimming Pool

Well, the Republicans were clobbered. Fancy that. A few years ago it seemed every thing was going their way. Now the Democrats will have to show that they are of better judgement. I have some doubts, but at least now that they have to work together, maybe the compromises will be better then what went before.

As quoted in San Francisco Chronicle today, Bush said "Look, people say unfortunate things at times, /.../. But if you hold grudges in this line of work, you're never going to get anything done." That was in regard to the harsh words Nancy Pelosi has said about him. Perhaps he should think along similar lines when dealing with Iran, North Korea and other obnoxious regimes. You need not like them, but please talk to them. Deal with them.

I went swimming this evening, indoors of course. The lights were dimmed and they were playing classical music, Vivaldi I believe. It might have been rather nice and relaxing, but they were playing it far to loud! It wasn't soothing at all, rather the opposite. It might have looked (sounded) good on paper, but in reality, well, I'm sorry, it just didn't work. And what's with all the splashing? I try to swim as splashfree as possible, but apparently I'm one of the endangered species.

On the love front, things are progressing fast and wonderful. As soon as we see each other, our hands get out of control, and soon end up on any given part of the other's body. And such a lovely body she has!

Weather, Love and Elections

Winter came, and went away almost as quickly. And now? It's neither autumn nor winter, neither spring nor summer. It's just weather, and as it says on my Korean t-shirt "We are fighting on the brink of Weather." I'm not sure what that means, but it somehow seems suitable on days such as these.

Days such as these are also full of love. It's wonderful! I watch her face when we talk and it makes me speechless. Is it possible? Is she really saying these things to me?

Tomorrow is election day in the US. Will the Democrats take over? I hope so. I'm tempted to say that, surely, anything is better than this. Maybe not. But I'm sure of one thing, and that is that the Republicans have spent the last years bullying, lying, cheating, harassing, torturing and stupefying as much as possible, whenever and wherever they've got the chance, with the odd honourable exception. How will it all end?

Afternoon Sun in Roppongi

Being Disconnected

Last Friday evening suddenly I no longer had access to Internet. Today, at long last, I was finally able to get back online. I'm not saying it has been all bad. Felt kinda nice for a while. Yesterday I talked on the phone for three hours with a certain someone for example, and it was ever so nice. She had suggested we talk on the Internet, but I gave her my phone number instead, and it might have been old fashioned, but I loved every second of it.

I have decided to quit my job, or rather, they thought they gave me an offer I couldn't refuse, but I did. So as of the first of 2007 I no longer have a job. At the same time I have a new apartment. Everything changes. What'll I do? I don't know. But it feels great! I feel like I can do anything. Maybe write here every single day. There's a buck in that racket, no?

I'm supporting a project to save tigers in India, maybe I will go there and support them with more than just money. Or I will go back to University, or find a new job, or go to Australia. I might combine all three alternatives, and go and work and study in Australia.

But now I will go back to my book, The Namesake, by Jhumpa Lahiri. I've read 50 pages so far and I'm hooked.